Take Time to Wonder

It's been a while since I've posted something new. I could explain myself, or I could just say I'm sorry and jump right back in to what I was doing... Sorry it's been so long! =)

Over Christmas break, I started reading The Knowledge of the Holy by A.W. Tozer. Now, I could talk for DAYS AND DAYS about all of the amazing things I have read so far in this book, but one thing in particular struck me and I've camped out on it for weeks now.

After writing about a man who sees a sunrise for the first time ever and is overwhelmed at the sight, Tozer offers a sobering thought: "How different are we who have grown used to it, who have become jaded with a satiety of wonder." ...Wow...

Let's define some things for the sake of understanding, shall we? I know we are all brilliant scholars, but as I learned in my education classes, you can't just assume that people know what you are talking about.
- "Jaded" - Tired, bored, or lacking enthusiasm, typically after having had too much of something.
- "Satiety" - The state of being satisfactorily full and unable to take on more.
- "Wonder" - Attention or astonishment at something awesomely mysterious or new to one's experience.
Recap: Tozer is saying that because we see so much of the awesomeness and mystery of the Lord in His creation, we have become bored with it because we see it so often.... ouch.

Story: When I first moved to Nevada, I woke up every day, without fail, and sat on my back porch for a few minutes, marveling at the glorious mountains that I can see from there. I would sit there every day and never grow tired of how beautiful those mountains are. In the summer, they house some of the only green in the high desert that isn't on a fabricated lawn. In the winter, the snowy peaks look like a postcard; almost fake, like they were painted by some great artist. Then it happened. I started waking up every day, and there they were, those same mountains. I started to think to myself, "Yeah, they pretty much look how they looked yesterday. Cool,"and I would move on to the rest of my day. It got to the point where I didn't even bother looking out the window at them anymore.

Then I read this line by Tozer, and it hit me. I had become jaded. I had become bored with the majesty and glory and incredible beauty of God's creation. I had "seen enough of it" and didn't feel the need to stop and take it all in. I had stopped making time to see the Lord in the little things, or even the big things. I issued a challenge to myself that day, and I want to share it with you:  

Every day, at least once, take time to wonder at God. 

Sometimes, I wonder at how the colors of the sky melt together in a beautiful sunset. Purple, red, orange, pink... they all run together like watercolors splashed over the horizon, and it's never the same.  Sometimes, I wonder at how few things are more refreshing than the smell of rain. A deep breath in, and I can just smell the newness falling from the sky. Sometimes, I wonder at how the sun rises every morning without an alarm clock. I wake up, and the sun is always faithful to rise. It never has a day that it sleeps in late or forgets to shine.

Now it's your turn. Every day, take time to wonder at God. I promise, it never gets old and you will never run out of things to wonder at. <3

Infectious Generosity

True story: every now and then, I get in this crazy mood. I have the desire to buy things for people, make things for people, leave people love notes, go on and on for days on end about how much I appreciate people... you know, I turn into "Crazy Mushy Danielle". The past few days is one of those times.

So, today I got to thinking. What incites these "generosity sprees" in my life? What compels me to constantly want to buy people small gifts (as small as a coffee, a piece of chocolate, or a cinnamon crunch bagel from Panera - it's my roomie's favorite), tell people how much I love and appreciate them, or leave encouraging notes on people's doors? Well, I don't necessarily think that the cause of it is always the same exact thing, but I have reached a conclusion as to how my most recent/current state of mushiness has come to be... in this case, it is pretty obvious to me how I got here.

Infectious generosity.

What on earth is infectious generosity? (It just popped into my head, so I ran with it.) I suppose the idea of infectious generosity is kind of the same idea as an infectious smile. You know that feeling - when someone smiles at you and it fills you with so much joy that you can't help smiling at someone else because of the happiness you received from the first smile? Infectious giving kinda feels like that, just on a grander scale.

Let's have an example, shall we? This week, I have felt encouraged, valued, appreciated, served, and truly considered by so many of my friends here at Liberty. It has come in the form of friends being hospitable during a visit to their homes (That's right... men of God serving other people in their own homes, and I was lucky enough to experience it twice in one week... but that's a blog for a different day.), encouraging words, small gifts, notes, posts to my Facebook wall or comments in my email - and that's not even the end of it! The list seems never ending this week. Out of the overflow of being poured into so much by others this week, I have wanted to make other people feel that way, too. Just like when people keep smiling at you and you feel compelled to smile back - people have been so generous to me, and I can't help but want to be generous to others in return. So now, this is my week - full of love notes, encouraging words, and little gifts. Out of the generosity of others toward me, all I want is to be generous to others. Infectious generosity has grabbed a hold of me this week in a big way, and it's not letting me go.

Could I sit here and make this into a lesson about generosity? Of course I could, but I'm not going to (okay, I might... you never know). Sometimes, when you have a good experience with something, you just want to tell someone. That's kind of what this is. This is me sharing the goodness of God in my life manifested in the relationships I have with people on this campus. This week has really been a reminder to me of how good God has been to me in the friendships he has allowed me to form with some of the most amazing people I could ever hope to have the privilege of calling "friend". They are generous to me with their resources, words, and time, and I feel encouraged to be generous out of the overflow of their generosity toward me.

Okay, I said I might make this thing into a lesson. It's really more of a parting thought. Someone has to be the first person to smile for it to be infectious. If one person doesn't smile first, the chain can't start. In the same way, someone has to be the first to be generous for generosity to be infectious. Be generous and see how much YOU will feel blessed by it just as much as the person you have shared with.

Smile first. Be generous first. Be blessed. <3

Are You Afraid of the Dark?

Today was a rough day in the best way possible. Have you ever had a day where there Lord stirs your heart and challenges you and you feel like you are forever changed? Yeah, that's what my day looked like today. I managed to make it through without being an emotional basket case, but only by a slim margin.

This morning at church, we talked about fear. Fear... let's see... what am I afraid of? I'm afraid of snakes. I'm afraid of spiders. I'm afraid that I'll fall down in public and everyone will laugh. I'm afraid of creepy crawly things lurking in the shadows, and I'm afraid nobody will be around to kill them for me. I'm afraid of the forest at night. That's all legitimate, right? That's not the issue, though. At my core, in the depths of my heart - what am I afraid of? Are there relationships I haven't invested in out of fear that someone will be less than careful and cautious with my vulnerable heart? Are there places I haven't gone because I'm afraid of danger and the unknown? Are there words I am not willing to speak to people out of fear that I will be mocked or rejected? What opportunities have I missed because fear won out? What blessings have I cheated someone else out of because I was afraid to get hurt? I cannot afford to live in fear anymore. Lucky for me, there's a way out. Love. Yup... love. 1 John 4:18 is the verse we went through today. "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love." You want to fight fear? Love. If true, godly, perfect love drives out fear and we choose to live in that, then where is there room for fear? There isn't. I can hear you now... "But if I choose not to live in fear, the things I'm afraid of really might happen!".  It's true; if you choose not to live in fear, it is totally possible that the things that you feared could happen. You might get your heart broken. You might go somewhere and get physically hurt. You might get mocked for speaking truth into someone's life. At the end of the day, when all is said and done, is the love of God not worth more than those things? Is the love of God not worth every sacrifice you can make? Will God not heal your heart from those pains? Did God not know what He was doing when you were mocked and felt rejected? I know that for me, God's perfect love and choosing to live in it is more important than even my own life. How can I choose to live in fear any longer when there is something so much better waiting for me? Between fear and love, I choose love.

Romans 12:15

I know it's been a while since I've posted anything, but today I started considering something in my head and heart. Since I'm and external processor, I figure here is a good a place as any to talk this all out with myself.

Romans 12:15 "Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn."

I've always been really great with the "rejoice with those who rejoice" part of Romans 12:15. It's easy. Something exciting happens, and the joy is just so infectious. It's hard not to rejoice with those people.

The part that has not come so naturally is the "mourn with those who mourn" part of Romans 12:15. Sympathy is easy for me. When something sad happens, it is easy to feel sad for the situation someone is in. Agreeing that something someone is going through is sad is simple. It is being a shoulder to cry on while you allow yourself to be the rock for someone in a situation. That being said, I think that sympathy is great. It is necessary, but does sympathy really count as mourning with those who mourn? I'm not entirely sure that it does. To truly and effectively mourn with those who mourn in a real way, I think empathy is necessary.

So, sympathy is the easy part. Empathy, on the other hand, is not something natural to me. It happens every now and then, but its not really a regular occurrence... until recently. In the past few months, something has shifted in my heart, and I find myself more emotionally vulnerable. Sympathy allows for a certain amount of distance from a situation, but empathy puts you right at the heart of the issue. Empathy takes the barrier of emotional distance and rips it to shreds.

I'm not sure what shifted in my heart that has allowed me to experience true empathy on a fairly regular basis, but experiencing what it really feels like to mourn with those who mourn has been quite an adventure. It is a gift, even on the days that my heart is breaking for those around me.

I pray that I can continue to truly rejoice with those who rejoice and share in their joy. I pray that I can continue to truly mourn with those who mourn and share in their sorrow, even when it hurts.

Well, this is unfortunate...

I have the tendency to start fabulous things (like a blog), then forget I have it and not do anything with it for weeks at a time. I had a Live Journal for a while when I worked at Disney, and the only time I would ever update it was when I was training at work and my trainees were reading the Operating Guidelines. Oh, goodness... I feel like I should have warned you all to begin with that this might happen. It's been over a month. My bad.

So, here's the thing... it's been a long time, and I don't really have anything hugely significant to share, but I felt like I needed to update this thing.

I'll give it some time and see if I can't think of something to share. =) In the mean time, I said time in the last sentence I wrote, and it made me think of a song called "Time". I like it...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qExpphxn56o Listen to it.

"Time"

What is time?
Is it the autumn leaves that change?
Or the snow that floats from the sky?

What is Time?
Is it the air we breathe,
Or the wings that teach
The new born bird to fly?

Who can tell?
I don’t know
Will we change?
Will we grow?

What is time?
Is it eternity in heaven
Or just a hope for peace on earth?

Where’s the time?
Gone in a blink of an eye
But with every blink
a birth.

We live
We learn
We love in time
We give
We yearn
We grow

In time

Time for change
Its time to care
It’s not too late
Don’t despair
Reach inside your heart
To find the joy and love
To share with all mankind
For all we know

All we have
Is time

<3

Theater thoughts

It's amazing how time gets away from you, sometimes. I mean, here I am thinking that I'll post something new every few days... a week and a half after my last post, here I sit - looking at my screen with nothing to write. Bummer.

So, let's make something up and run with it. =) Ah, here we are...

I went to Liberty's Tower Theater tonight for a performance of Phantom of the Opera. I will spare you all from having to hear me gush about everything I loved about it. You can ask me if you wanna know that bad. This is what I will say, though. It still amazes me that there are people on this campus who do not take advantage of the incredible opportunity to attend the theater here. I realize that Liberty's theater program is not a theater with paid actors or anything like that, but goodness gracious, it's close. They do a fantastic job! Not only that, but the chance to go to the theater for only $7, especially with shows like Hairspray and Phantom of the Opera, is rare.

I know a lot of people don't really care for the theater. I get that it's a lot of dancing and singing, and some people really don't like that. What a pity. So many people have these preconceived notions of what musical theater really is. The thing about music is that it draws people in and connects them in a way that dialogue really can't. It's a connector. On a stage, there is so much to actually see when people are performing - sets, facial expressions, special effects - the spectacle of it all is fascinating. Not all theater is super campy, not all of it is cheesy, and there really is something for everyone (way to sound totally cliche, right? It's true, though.).

There are a ton of great reasons why people should go to the theater - at least once. It doesn't even have to be at Liberty - just go. Somewhere. Anywhere. For the sake of being more well rounded and expanding your cultural horizons, it's important to go. Do yourself a huge favor and go to the theater. You can thank me later. If nothing else, you can use it as a great date opportunity. ;)


 

Lessons in leadership

Sometimes, I'm amazed at everything I have yet to learn. Even after years of ministry with young women, there is still such a vast abyss of endless things to learn about what it really means to be an effective leader.

I was challenged this week in regards to what kind of leader I am for the girls that live under my leadership at Liberty. I have 30 girls who live on my hall. They see me every day, and I know that the girls who live in my quad see even more of the real me than even the girls on my hall do. Not only do the girls on my hall see me, but I know that there are other people on campus who are well aware of the fact that I am in a position of leadership at school. That's a lot of people looking to me as a leader. Crazy.. and scary. Very scary.

It was brought to my attention on Monday night that being in a visible leadership position at a Christian university (well, really... any place I am, but I'm in college for now) can't be only about being a good example of spiritual maturity. As a leader on the Liberty campus, I can't assume that being spiritually solid is really the only thing people will be looking at. If people look up to you as a leader, they're going to look at your whole life, not just one aspect of it.

People are not going to only look at my spiritual life. They will look at everything they can see in me.
- How I dress
- How I talk (or don't talk) about other people
- How I handle conflict
- How I treat my body in diet and exercise
- How I handle stress
- How I manage my time between school and friends
- If I do my homework on time
- How I respond to authority
- If I allow myself to rest or not
- What I watch on TV or what movies I watch

And that's not even the whole list! It could go on forever. What an incredibly humbling and sobering thought. I've spent the better part of two days really thinking through this. Some of the things listed are things I never would have considered being part of leadership. I've never taken the opportunity to sit down and ask myself how the movies people see me watch could possibly affect what they see as acceptable or right. I've never thought about whether or not I allow myself to rest would even be noticed by the girls who live on my hall. Oh my word, it's insane how much I had not considered these things.

I'm not going to sit here and pretend that I am doing great in all of these areas. That would be absurd and foolish... and a lie.  I fall incredibly short in a lot of these areas, but the really cool thing about awareness is that it breeds opportunity for change. With the realization that people will see even the minor details of my life, I get the chance to really reevaluate what kind of example I set to the students of this campus. Every day, I get to ask myself, "If I were someone else, would I see an example worth following in Danielle?". I only hope that as I have the opportunity to set a new example, that I don't let it go to waste.

Don't let your opportunity go to waste. <3